In honor of the beloved duck hunting season (coming this friday to a swamp near you) and also for the 2 most passionate duck hunters I've ever met, I've decided to teach you how to duck hunt here in southern Alabama. You ready for this? You'll be blown away by my extense knowledge I've learned in only a few months.
1. Find a swamp.
But not just any old swamp. You need some trees in the swamp.
2. Learn that ducks fly at sunrise and sunset. But around here, you can't really hunt at sunset b/c of some regulation that I don't know about. So, just trust me. Go in the morning.
3. You need these:
Chest waders. Because you have to walk in the swamp, in freezing cold weather and on top of the alligators (that supposedly "hibernate" at the bottom... that is until they wake up and bite your leg off).
4. Get a duck call. They say there's some sort of technique to doing it well, but I think you just blow in it. And no, just quacking like a duck won't work. :)
5. Grow a beard and paint your face like these guys. Don't know why. Just do it.
p.s. these are apparently the duck hunting gods- the duck commanders. Bless their wives. They have it worse than me and Megan. lol... just kidding boys! :)
6. Walk out in the swamp, be really still & shoot the ducks when they fly over. Then, convince someone to go get them & come home and eat breakfast.
The end. Aren't you impressed? Matthew taught me well, don't you think? :)
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10 months ago